Tuesday, May 17, 2005

The Knitting Police

I've just returned from my LYS and I am still shaking with laughter. I was in Shipston Needlecraft, chatting away to Nickie and Jane, showing off the final stages off the Heirloom Shawl. I pointed out that I'm not so terribly keen on the selvedge, which is a twisted knit stitch on the right side and a purl on the wrong side, but anyway, I'm sure it will be fine when it's blocked and I don't suppose the Knitting Police will be running down the street after me saying, "That doesn't look like the picture."

I left them at the front of the shop and went down to the "Wool Room" (where else?), which is tucked away right at the back of the shop. I was browsing around in there when I heard the crackle of a radio. Suddenly, a burly policeman appeared and said (and I quote), "Excuse me, madam, there have been reports of some badly executed knitting and we need to investigate further. If you'd like to come with me - and bring your knitting bag." Whereupon Nicky appeared, roaring with laughter. She'd set me up, good and proper. She'd spotted the policeman walking down the street, rushed out, explained the situation and asked him to "Be a sport".

Well, it made my day. I'm still laughing now.

You'll notice the "Weather Pixie" has appeared. This is mainly a sop to "'im indoors" (who shall remain nameless due to his complete paranoia about cyberspace.) Yes, he's paranoid all right. Apparently, I'm to beware of "trolls" - what is this - the Three Little Billy Goats Gruff? It seems a troll is someone who repeatedly leaves nasty comments on blogs. Well, I don't know. I'd be glad if anyone left a comment, troll or not.

Not only is he paranoid, he is also completely obsessed with the weather. We must watch the weather forecast; we must listen to the weather forecast; we must look up the weather forecast on the web. Number One Daughter once asked,"If Daddy wants to know what the weather's like, why doesn't he look out of the window?" (Out of the mouths of babes, don't you think?) I didn't think he'd noticed this blog, but this morning as I went down the garden path to help him bring the shopping in, I happened to say it was a bit chilly, despite the sunshine. "Yes," he replied, "the wind is from the north-east, 5.9mph."

So, he's been sneaking looks!

True to form, as the end of the Heirloom Shawl draws near, I've cast on for another project. No pictures yet - partly because I've only done two rows, partly because it's a present for my friend, Clare and I do not want to let the cat out of the bag. (There may be a clue in there somewhere.)


littlelixie said...

I seem to be becoming a cyber-stalker but I am enjoying your blog. (Saw your post on UKHandKnitters) I love the story - Has made me laugh too!

Rebekah said...

That's hilarious! It reminds me of when my dad turned 50. His next door work neighbor had the Sheriff in town come to dad's work and arrest him because of some supposed outstanding warrant in Black Hawk County. Dad didn't know what to say, the Sheriff (also an acquaintanace of my father) said well since he knew him he wouldn't cuff him but he had to come with him. so they left in the patrol car and swiftly turned into the next driveway where a band was waiting and signs on their business teasing dad about turning 50.

Apparently cops do have a sense of humor.

Becky said...

What a fab story - I think I would have wet my pants seeing a policeman coming towards me with intent !!!

I'm in awe of your shawl work - it looks so difficult - I don't think I'd have the patience.

larprincessa said...

This is a great story - and bless you for publishing it here, instead of on the KnitList.

Lauri B. said...

I'm also enjoying your blog after seeing your post on UKHandknitters. :)

Diane said...

Hello, I've just found your blog, I think I live just up the road from you.
Are you going to the workshop at Shipston Needlecrafts on Friday, I am, it should be fun
I really like your blog.

FaeryCrafty said...

What a great joke! I love that :)

Tracy said...

They're wicked friends! You'll have to get your own back, revenge will be sweet ;) Don't worry too much about trolls (I've never heard them called that before!) I don't think knitty people have bad bones in their bodies, it's all encouragement and great friendly banter.

Andrea said...

Thanks for the info. re the yarn shop near The Cotswolds! Just linked to your blog and read the policeman story ... great fun!